Barbecue culture and the decline of gas

Once we get rid of gas, I’m worried that the backyard barbie will be under threat. How will men socialise and talk about footy? Is the environmental benefit sufficient to outweigh the threat to Aussie blokehood?
E.F., South Yarra, Vic

A: Years ago, I wrote a newspaper story called “Tongmaster” about this exact phenomenon. How Aussie men are compelled to gather around backyard barbecues, drawn there like moths to a flame – huge, hairy moths wearing oversized cargo shorts with too many pockets and undersized merch T-shirts from a rock concert they saw in the 2000s.

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Once at the barbecue, these men will sip beers and discuss blokey stuff: sport, music, politics and, most of all, whether the sausages should be poked with holes or whether they cook better…